Fearfully and Wonderfully Made
I’ve been thinking a lot about the promise in Psalm 139. Specifically, verses 13 and 14:
For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
God’s ability to create infinitely beautiful things overwhelms me. I am left breathless by the majesty of the world around me. The intricate details on the wings of butterflies and flower petals completely amaze me. The sensation of warm sunshine on my skin in spring and cool breeze on my face in the fall remind me of the gentleness of my Creator.
Waterfalls are my favorite things in nature. I could sit at the base of a waterfall and listen to the crashing water, the birds, and all the other sounds of nature for hours. I love the smell of damp earth and decaying leaves. I love the way the sunlight dances through dense foliage. I love the way moss sways to the rhythm of the current. I love the contrast of a boulder’s roughness against the softness of my skin. All this gives me an indescribable sense of peace while at the same time reminding me of my own fragility compared to these majestically destructive forces of nature.
So then, it stands to reason that I would celebrate Psalm 139. The same God that created all these wonderfully beautiful things that bring me such joy also created me…my inmost being…knit me together… actually took time and created… me. I believe that God created me exactly the way He wants me to be. It just doesn’t FEEL that way. I don’t feel fearfully and wonderfully made. I feel flawed and broken and torn apart. I feel inadequate, failing, feeble, weak, and incompetent.
Satan loves to remind me of what a wretched sinful beast I am. He constantly and consistently points out my fears and failures. He reminds me that others excel in areas in which I struggle. He tells me all day every day that I am damaged, weak, flawed, broken, tarnished, and completely unusable by God. Maybe he does the same to you. Maybe you are reading this and thinking the same as me…
“I’m just broken.”
Maybe you, like me, have failed at more things than you can count. I’ve learned from those failures and none of them have defeated me permanently. I hope this is also the case for you. God can and does use us in spite of (and sometimes BECAUSE of) our failures, flaws, setbacks, and downfalls. Scripture says “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” Romans 8:28 NIV
God can (and does) still use me…even in my brokenness. He can (and will) use you too.
Most importantly, I know that the One who knit me together originally can put me back together even now, no matter how broken I feel.
Pray with me?
I want to love the woman You created when You created me. I want to embrace and cultivate the ways that You have gifted me instead of comparing my weaknesses to other women’s strengths. I don’t want to be prideful…that’s not it at all. I simply want to love who You made me to be. I want to embrace and celebrate the unique way You put me together and use the gifts You have given me instead of feeling inferior because my gifts are different than someone else’s. I want to enjoy my quirks. I want to appreciate my unique way of looking at the world around me. I want to celebrate the passions You have placed in my heart. I want to be thankful for all of the unique things that make me…me… instead of always fighting against these things and wishing I were different. I’m not there yet, Lord, not by a long shot… but I’m closer than I was yesterday, and, with Your help, I hope to be a bit closer tomorrow.