On The Job Healing

I’ve got things wrong with me.

Wounds of past rejections, bruises of past failures, hurts of past losses, and aches of unforgiveness.

I work in health care, so I’ve done what I thought I should to heal those bumps and bruises from life—I nursed them.

Bandaged them up. Hid them from view. And medicated myself with soothing words:

“This too shall pass.”

“Time heals all wounds.”

“God loves me just the way I am.”

“I’ll get over it.”

Only I haven’t.

Sure I’m better than I was. I’ve made progress, but I’m not HEALED.

Maybe lower case letter healed, but not Capital letter healed.

I know this because over time I’ve become paralyzed—afraid to do certain things, talk to certain people, or feel certain feelings.

Nursing my hurts has made me weak, not strong—living life in a partially paralyzed state afraid to risk being hurt again.

Afraid.

Because nursing has been about trying to feel better, not get better.

I’m not a nurse. I’m an occupational therapist. I work in rehabilitation—the place where people have to take action in order to heal.

I should have known better.

It was one of those “Duh, I could have had a V8” moments a few weeks ago. Maybe I just didn’t want to listen to what God had been trying to teach me for years and years. Or I only partially listened, but never got the whole message.

I get it now.

I can get by in life lower cased letter healed. I can live the life God desires for me if I’m capital letter HEALED.

But it means I have to take action. And actions are scary. They make things hurt again.

I’ll have to feel some of the hurt  if I take action to step out and forgive someone. And not just forgive…love them. That’s what Jesus did. And that’s what capital letter healed does too:

Dear children, let’s not merely say that we love each other; let us show the truth by our actions. 1 John 3:18 (New Living Translation)

Show the truth by our actions. Not just with words. To me that means forgiveness is not a feeling: it’s an action. Healing is not about nursing my hurts and waiting to feel better. It’s about taking the actions necessary to feel better.

God is my rehabilitation therapist now, and He’s giving me some specific action steps to take to become capital letter HEALED. So for starters I’m going to go love on some people who I felt hurt me.

Because Jesus loves them.

And so should I.

My friend calls it “on-the-job healing.”

It could be the best job I’ve ever taken.

Linda Crawford

Linda loves to color life beautiful as God teaches her how: a courageous faith = a colorful life. It took a devastating work injury, 4 years of chronic pain and disability, and almost dying for Linda to discover that sometimes life becomes the most beautiful when it seems the darkest and most colorless, because …Only God can color life beautiful then. Join Linda in coloring life beautiful on her blog: http://coloringlifebeautiful.com/

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6 Comments

  1. Dear readers,
    I have to share how amazing our God is!
    I wrote this devotion about three weeks ago, before an incredible incident happened in my life. An incident that God prepared me for just in time!

    Two weeks ago I went for a physical therapy treatment that involved trigger point needling and ended up being only the 3rd person in the US to suffer a punctured lung from the procedure. I was suddenly in a fight for my life!

    It may be a miracle that I am alive, but an even greater miracle is that I did not have one shred of anger or frustration. When my husband called to let my therapist know what had happened she was at a prayer meeting. She prayed for me and I prayed for her. I know she felt terrible.

    I can honestly say that this challenge was one of the greatest things that has ever happened in my life. I love Jesus more, and I know that I am capable of loving people more than I ever have in my life. So it should be no surprise that God orchestrated the timing of this devotion to also coincide with the first time (TODAY) I will be seeing my physical therapist since that awful day. I am going to give her a big hug, tell her I love her and that she is an awesome, wonderful person and that we never have to talk about what happened again.

    Because Jesus healed me. In more ways than one.

    Love you all, and thanks for letting me share a part of my journey with you!!

    (If you want to read more of this story visit my blog at http://sunnysideupnotscrambled.wordpress.com/2011/03/09/todays-menu-cinnamon-toast/)

    Reply
    • Linda,
      God is so clearly using this in your life to not only draw you to Him, but to clearly reveal the work He is doing in your life…He has great plans for the days to come…I JUST KNOW it! We are blessed to be sharing the journey with you!
      Peace,
      Lori

      Reply
  2. My husband had multiple affairs throughout our marriage and this article really hits home. I am so scared of being that hurt again and just feel like I have to have a wall around my heart. I know I need to get Healed. It is so difficult. Thank you for your words of truth.

    Reply
  3. Your post reminded me of about 13 years ago, when I lost a baby girl half-way through my pregnancy. I was devestated – I remember being so excited because here was a little girl, whom my husband and I would love, who would be not be broken through rejection, who would have a chance for wholeness that I did not have. When we got the test results back and I found out our baby had been a girl, I heard this audible voice behind me say, “I have a whole healthy girl planned for you.” He wasn’t talking about my baby girl; he was talking about me. He could make me whole. He could heal my brokenness. Like you said, I did not have to live with lower case healing (my mind overcoming, but leaving spirit and soul aching untouched). My Father HEALED my spirit, my soul and my mind.

    Reply

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