Wounds of past rejections, bruises of past failures, hurts of past losses, and aches of unforgiveness.
I work in health care, so I’ve done what I thought I should to heal those bumps and bruises from life—I nursed them.
Bandaged them up. Hid them from view. And medicated myself with soothing words:
“This too shall pass.”
“Time heals all wounds.”
“God loves me just the way I am.”
“I’ll get over it.”
Only I haven’t.
Sure I’m better than I was. I’ve made progress, but I’m not HEALED.
Maybe lower case letter healed, but not Capital letter healed.
I know this because over time I’ve become paralyzed—afraid to do certain things, talk to certain people, or feel certain feelings.
Nursing my hurts has made me weak, not strong—living life in a partially paralyzed state afraid to risk being hurt again.
Because nursing has been about trying to feel better, not get better.
I’m not a nurse. I’m an occupational therapist. I work in rehabilitation—the place where people have to take action in order to heal.
I should have known better.
It was one of those “Duh, I could have had a V8” moments a few weeks ago. Maybe I just didn’t want to listen to what God had been trying to teach me for years and years. Or I only partially listened, but never got the whole message.
I get it now.
I can get by in life lower cased letter healed. I can live the life God desires for me if I’m capital letter HEALED.
But it means I have to take action. And actions are scary. They make things hurt again.
I’ll have to feel some of the hurt if I take action to step out and forgive someone. And not just forgive…love them. That’s what Jesus did. And that’s what capital letter healed does too:
Dear children, let’s not merely say that we love each other; let us show the truth by our actions. 1 John 3:18 (New Living Translation)
Show the truth by our actions. Not just with words. To me that means forgiveness is not a feeling: it’s an action. Healing is not about nursing my hurts and waiting to feel better. It’s about taking the actions necessary to feel better.
God is my rehabilitation therapist now, and He’s giving me some specific action steps to take to become capital letter HEALED. So for starters I’m going to go love on some people who I felt hurt me.
Because Jesus loves them.
And so should I.
My friend calls it “on-the-job healing.”
It could be the best job I’ve ever taken.