Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that person, and they with me. (Revelation 3:20)
If it’s true that a front door is a home’s smile, then mine is frowning. Dull, dinged and drafty, my door has seen better days. My husband and I decided it was time for a new one.
Still I’m even further from making a decision than when I started. Who knew there were so many choices? Solid or glass? Elegant or understated? Steel or fiberglass? Double door or single with sidelites? Dark or light color? I have made up and changed my mind dozens of times.
My husband has patiently listened to my many door iterations. But last week when I presented my latest idea—and then changed my mind the next day—he jumped off my crazy train called indecision.
“I thought we’d made a decision,” he sighed.
“I don’t know. I’m still not sure.”
Not that I know what I’m looking for, but I know I need a vision to move forward. It’s just the way I am. Plus this really is a big decision. A front door is expensive and it sets the tone for what’s inside. It’s where your home puts its best foot forward. And I don’t want to misstep.
A while back I was a newer Christian and everyone was buzzing about finding their purpose—the thing that God had put them on earth for.
“What’s your purpose?” others asked.
“Gosh, I don’t know,” I replied.
Honestly I don’t think I’d ever seriously considered the question before. But, since I was committed to growing as a Christian I figured I should put “finding a purpose” at the top of my to-do list.
I read books. Talked to others. Listened to preachers. And examined my skills. But nothing solidified. Should I lead or follow? Teach or be taught? Work with children or adults? Be in the spotlight or work behind the scenes? Serve locally or globally?
I was overwhelmed with indecision and an impending sense of failure. What if I make the wrong choice? What if I don’t discover my purpose? What I don’t even have one!? I didn’t have a vision and didn’t want to make a mistake with such a life-defining decision, so I did nothing. I didn’t want to step out until I could get it right.
In the years since, I’ve learned that finding my purpose is nothing at all like buying a front door. It’s like opening a door that’s already there. It’s not a one-time decision I’m stuck with: it’s a process. A process of taking little steps. Of saying “Yes” when I’m not sure of the destination. Of having faith that when Jesus says, “follow me,” I can trust where He’s leading—even when it’s way off my map. This process isn’t even one I’m driving, it’s one that I’m discovering.
Just like my front door’s primary purpose is to keep out the elements and intruders, my primary purpose as a Christian—and yours too—is to “sing the glory of his name; make his praise glorious.” (Psalm 66:2) We all share this purpose. Our lives need to point to the Father. How we accomplish this is where we display our individuality and where our Creator displays His incredible creativity.