Have you ever been falsely accused? Have others said things about you that were complete lies or a cruel distortion of the facts?
Yeah, me too. It is a very painful thing to deal with. And for some reason, it often happens when we are motivated to do something good for others. Our motivation is to help them, and for whatever reason, it gets taken out of context and ends up flying back in our faces.
I am watching this happen to some people that I dearly love right now. People that are doing everything they can to help others, but are being attacked for it on every side.
Of course we know that our true enemy is Satan, the father of lies. He twists and manipulates things to get people into as much strife as possible, because he knows quite well that if we are arguing with one another we will be distracted from God’s will and purposes.
Jesus gives us such a beautiful example to follow. As He is brought before Herod in court, He is mocked and falsely accused.
Luke 23:9-12, NLT
Meanwhile, the leading priests and the teachers of religious law stood there shouting their accusations. 11 Now Herod and his soldiers began mocking and ridiculing Jesus. Then they put a royal robe on him and sent him back to Pilate.
How did Jesus respond?
I know how I would have wanted to respond…I would have defended myself. I would have told them the truth!
But in the book of Matthew, Jesus shows us how we are to respond to accusations and lies being spoken against us.
Matt 27:12-14, NLT
But when the leading priests and other leaders made their accusations against him, Jesus remained silent. 13 “Don’t you hear their many charges against you?” Pilate demanded. 14 But Jesus said nothing, much to the governor’s great surprise.
Our natural response is to say something…to explain the truth and defend ourselves. That is why the governor was so surprised at Jesus’ silence.
It’s just not natural to remain silent in such a situation!
This is a powerful key to leadership.
Don’t let the lies and accusations of others affect you.
Jesus didn’t.
Instead, He knew His purpose in this life. He knew that the heart of man could be evil and yet He chose to love those who He had every “natural” right to loath.
He even goes a step farther than not responding…He chooses love and forgiveness.
Luke 23:33-34, NIV
When they came to the place called the Skull, there they crucified him, along with the criminals-one on his right, the other on his left. 34 Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.”
What an incredible example of leadership for us to follow.
Sometimes the very people that are pouring pain into our lives are the ones God wants us to love~ even as they are hurting us.
Hurting people, hurt people.
Healthy people love.
1 Peter 2:15, NLT
It is God’s will that your good lives should silence those who
make foolish accusations against you.
Thankfully, God doesn’t expect us to do this without His help.
When I am faced with a situation like this I have to go to the Lord in prayer and plead for His help because my natural response is not always love. I have to follow hard after Him if I want my actions to reflect His love!
I believe that the Lord wants His women to be leaders in this area.
Woman Up!
Follow hard after your God…
Lead soft with His love!
Oh, it’s so hard to do but I so often have heard you say “hurt people hurt people” and it’s a good thing to remember in the midst of it all, when you are hurting so badly. Great post, once again….
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Yup, and it’s a good thing I wrote this a month ago, I needed it today!
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I agree in some ways, but I don’t believe Jesus expects us to do everything in silence. Sometimes you HAVE to face the bully to protect a church. When it is the pastor telling lies to be able to sin, you have to do something to protect the church.
I’m watching that happen right now. I tried the silence route and a group of people who know the truth have been fighting the lies, but even with proof of the truth, nothing is being done.
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I am so sorry about your situation, sounds like a really tough one. Keep following the peace of God, I’m sure He’ll bring out the truth in time.
Praying for you!
Sue
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Oh girl, did I need to read this today. Thank you for sharing this truth about following Jesus example!
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It’s one that I myself have learned the hard way and I need constant reminders of…I always think of that verse…don’t answer a fool according to his folly-lest you be like him.
Thanks Kristine!
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So true. It’s been a hard road, but learning that God does the vindicating, not me is how it’s supposed to work. Time will tell. Time always tells. Ya know? Thanks for such a great word, my friend. Love you!
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I know
Love you too girlfriend!
Sue
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Wow…this was awesome! Being in ministry, and having bad things said about you that are not true is hurtful. We just went through this and I wanted to defend ourselves right away but my husband said, “No, that’s not what Jesus would do.” Oh so hard but it is the right way. But lately I have been wanting to respond to let these people know how they hurt us, but I need to woman up and lead soft with HIS love! Thanks for this encouragement!
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Cathy,
Keep standing girlfriend!
Love never fails!
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Love never fails Cathy!
Keep standing girlfriend, God will be your vindicator!
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Wow, Sue~Your words are such a timely reminder -love what you said about God wanting us to love the very people who are pouring pain into our lives- especially hit close to my heart, thank you for sharing some much needed Truth!
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Reminds us of Joseph doesn’t it?! God used him to deliver the very ones that pit him in the pit!
Hugs,
Sue
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“He even goes a step farther than not responding…He chooses love and forgiveness.”
Wow, that’s a tough one when your feelings are hurt and you so badly want to respond. Thanks for sharing this. I think I need to read it over and over as I deal with someone that continually presses my button.
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Me too girl, me too!!!
Love ya!
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Very true.
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And if it happens at your church and you are hurt, don’t leave! Do what this well worded blog and the Bible says…don’t suffer in silence! Fight back by taking the high road. Like it says in JOhn 3:18 or 19 or 20, paraphasing it of course, a person following God’s Word can step into the light so that people may see it is of God. Step into the light! Show in your silence and you will make a difference stronger than any words you might have spoken in your defense.
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Love never fails!
However I think that there are some churches that are abusive and you may have to leave to be safe…just like a woman in an abusive relationship.
But that is certainly not what most of us are facing…we should always seek to forgive and heal in the place we are planted first.
Thanks Nikole!
Much love!
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Oh, Sue! You don’t even know the half of it!
Over a year ago, a neighbor that my oldest girls had put their trust in (and I’d bent over backwards to help multiple times) betrayed us in a way that we never saw coming.
Our reaction: Trust God to be our vindicator; praise Him through the trial, forgive and pray for those who hate us.
Do you know what we found during that?: Peace…indescribable peace.
I think that the thing that made it easier to do that was knowing that it was certainly the enemy and she was his instrument. Also, that everything that we were accused of was a lie.
Thank you so much Sue for bringing how Jesus led to light!
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Kela,
Thank you so much for sharing that! I too have found peace…even when/if all the lies continue. God works it out and often He gives you opportunity to share the truth at the right time and when our hearts are right.
He’s so good!!!
Sue
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Thank you so much for this post! There is an elder’s wife at our church whose daughter was dating our son. Anyway, I thought this elder’s wife was my friend, but she lied about me and her daughter lied about me and it caused so much problems in our family. I have been so hurt that we (my husband and I) left our church. Trying to forgive in all of this has been extremely difficult. Learning to keep silent and let God vendicate me has been a true lesson. Thank you for reinforcing this truth of letting God be my vendicator!
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