What Do You Wear To The Grocery Store? (Part 2)

After I wrote the post “What Do YOU Wear To The Grocery Store?“ God brought more to my mind and I decided that I wanted to share some of it! So grab yourself a BIG mug of something and stay awhile. I’ve got some sharing to do!

First I must clarify one thing. I have NOTHING against silver high heeled shoes. REALLY. I DON’T!!! I just know that if I wore them to the grocery store, not only would I have to hold on to the cart so I wouldn’t fall flat on my face, but I would NOT gain the respect of those around me…no matter what the experts say! In fact, someone would probably call security when they saw this old lady clomping down the aisle trying to stand up! !

God has been SO GRACIOUS to remind me of the times in my life when I have been selfish when it came to how I dressed, wanted to draw attention to myself and sought to gain the approval of others. I am thankful for His reminder because it humbles me and also acts as a warning for me that I could be there again in a heartbeat! That is why I need to keep focused on Jesus.

In college I was very concerned about what others thought. I was consumed with what I wore and how I looked. I remember someone said to me once that she was always glad when she got to class before I did so she could watch me walk in and see what I was wearing that day. (Oh, yes! I was known for my godly character in those days!) I have had a few other people tell me over the years that it took awhile for them to get to know me because they were afraid of me or intimidated by me. All because I was so caught up in being “put together.”

After I got married and had my daughter I became very sick and lost a lot of weight. I was not really over weight to begin with but losing weight caused me to become smaller than I had ever been as an adult. The size I became while being sick was really not good for my medium bone structure but I loved being that small. And let me tell you, I was taking advantage of it! I wore things I had never been able to wear before! I got a lot of compliments. I LIKED THE ATTENTION! In fact, I liked it so much that I was AFRAID TO GET WELL…because I didn’t want to go back to my normal weight! That is a pretty sad way of thinking!

Through a series of circumstances God began to open my eyes to how UGLY MY HEART WAS. I may have looked okay on the outside but that was ALL that looked okay! I began to HATE what I was seeing about myself. Reacting to what I saw in my heart, I began to dress THE OPPOSITE of how I had been dressing. I cleaned out my closet and got rid of all the clothes that I had worn with a prideful heart. I began to dress very plainly. And you know what I found? The same pride that was in my heart when I was dressed to the hilt…well, it was still there. Only now I felt prideful about how “godly” I was by dressing plainly.The Holy Spirit began to slowly bring me to a place of balance!

I am still tempted in this area. I guess it is just part of who I am. But I work very hard at keeping balanced. I still enjoy wearing attractive clothes, putting some makeup on and doing my hair. But now my goal is to look the best I can in order to be a good testimony…and then I try to MOVE ON FROM MYSELF!

One of the saddest parts of this story is that, in my pride and self focus, I have missed opportunities to build relationships with other women. If we are focused on ourselves we cannot be focused on God and be sensitive to others! THE VERY THING THAT I THOUGHT WAS GAINING APPROVAL FROM OTHERS WAS WHAT WAS PUSHING THEM AWAY!! The reality is that we as women can be tempted to dress and get attention from men, but I think that there are also times we dress to get approval from….other women

Here are some questions I like to ask myself:

Am I ‘approachable’ or do I cause other women to feel intimidated?”

” Are women drawn to me because of my Christ likeness?”

” Am I a welcoming person in how I present myself?”

“What are my “heart motives” for the way I dress?”

“Are there those that I potentially could encourage or minister to who might feel intimidated?”

In my experience if I am too focused on myself and what I look like, I am not as sensitive to the needs of others. It is so important that each of us search our hearts and see what is really there. I mean REALLY see it, admit to any ugliness that is there and turn from it!

Can you understand why soaking ourselves in the philosophy of our culture and its ideas of how we should present ourselves is not what God would desire for us? Can you see how it might hinder our walk with Him and the work He may want to do in the lives of others?

I find that to be very sobering!!

Gina Smith

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